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Monday, July 23, 2012

The Itsy Bitsy Spider...

I couldn't even put a picture of a real spider because I got too freaked out searching them....{via}

I have a legitimate fear of spiders. I always have and I'm pretty sure I always will. Except it's not a fear where I kill them immediately or run out of the room. I just freeze...I can't take my eyes off of that creepy crawly eight legged monster. I am terrified if I look away this creature will magically disappear and end up on my body or even worse in my hair where it will immediately lay eggs...even if it isn't pregnant. And so I sit, frozen in fear staring at the stupid spider. Which brings me to this story....

It was a late gloomy Friday night, Shane was helping his brother Travis set up for the yard sale we were having the next day and I was home alone. I was in the kitchen cleaning up a few things and walked over to the garbage to throw away some trash. I literally screamed and jumped back about 4 feet when in the corner of my eye I saw it moving...yes, it was a creepy, long legged, thirsty for my blood, probably pregnant, spider. I could almost hear it drooling at the thought of eating me alive. I immediately called Shane to tell him to hurry over to my house and kill this monster. Of course...he didn't answer. So I tried again, no answer. It looked like I was on my own to fend for myself...just me and this starving ugly spider.

I sat there frozen and decided I couldn't go all night just standing in my kitchen having a stare off with this blood thirsty thing, but there was no way in hell I would be able to just leave it and go to bed. I needed a way to kill this spider without getting any closer than two feet. HAIRSPRAY! (of all things to pop into my head at a moment like this...) So I walked backwards to my bathroom, keeping my eye on the spider, and quickly snagged my wet hairspray as well as my aerosol hairspray. You can never be too prepared when killing a spider. I proceeded back over to my nemesis.

I got in my defensive stance, aerosol hairspray in one hand and my herbal essence wet hairspray in the other, took a deep breath and BAM I went to town on that freaky thing! He wasn't going to give up though...he kept running around and weaving his sticky web. I decided if I was going to come out of this battle alive I needed something stronger. I reached to the cupboard beside me and grabbed out my kitchen cleaners...thank God for 409 and Green Works...I started with the green works and ended with the good old 409.

It was a long and hard battle but in the end I came out alive. Shane called me back right after my conquer of this sneaky home invader. Even after it was dead I couldn't bring myself to grab it...I mean what if the spider world trains them to be really good at playing dead?! I couldn't risk that. Shane got to my house and being the brave soul he is snatched up the spider and threw him away!

Like I is awful. Thank God for boyfriends! If Shane was scared of spiders we would be doomed to surrender our lives.

This is the perfect quote for me! haha!

What are your guys phobias??



  1. LOL I'm scared of spiders but my biggest phobia is ketchup! Lol Weird I know but back to insects. I think that they're mother natures worst creation ever!!!

    There was a bee in my room last summer and I was home alone with my boys and I grabbed my lysol cleaning supply and sprayed the b**** lol. Household cleaners work. Now we have sprayed our windows and sliding door with insect stuff so none of them come in. lol

  2. Oh, Kjerstin, I am just cracking up at the visual you drew out with your story. It was too much. Thanks for the morning laugh!


  3. Lol...lovin' your blog. Great post. Keep up the awesome work...

    Peace!...with 2 fingers;)

  4. New follower here :)
    I also HATE spiders but have learned to try to tell myself that yes, I am much larger than it and if I don't kill it while it's still in my view, it will crawl into my bed while I am sleeping at night and roam up and down my body and eventually end up in my mouth. *PUKE* So.. that definitely motivates me to kill them upon sight. :)
    Cute story!!!

  5. Okay, for real. . I think we could be absolutely great FRIENDS! Spiders are scary. I'm terrified. But not just that. I cry. I saw a hobo spider (those HUGE QUARTER-SIZED ONES!) on the wall near our bed and I like started whining. It's bad! I don't even have the balls to vacuum it up or kill it. I just stare at it and wait til my husband comes home to kill it. It's pretty sad. ahhaha!

    I found your blog through Sammantha! I am your new follower (and excited!)

    Amanda at: we & serendipity

  6. My the biggest phobia is butterflies ! Really, I know it may sound silly, but I can't do nothing with this x)

    By the way I really like your blog !
    I follow you already, hope you follow me back :)

    Hugs from Warsaw



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